Dealing with College Roommate Troubles
College is a wonderful time. You are learning new things everyday, learning a lot about yourself and developing friendships that often last a lifetime. The possibilities are endless, and it is the time of your life. Then reality sets in and you move into your dorm with your roommate.
When it comes to your college roommate, questions may pop up. Will we get along? What if I can’t the person? While some roommate conflict may be inevitable, it is possible to avoid some of the bigger problems, and save yourself a lot of wasted time and energy.
Your college roommate can end up being your best friend or your worst enemy making you wish you chose that online degree program. You have to live in extremely close quarters and are forced to spend a lot of time together. You share the good, the bad and the bathroom! If you’re matched with someone very compatible to you, then you’ll welcome the experience, but bad college roommates can make an otherwise exciting time, very unpleasant. Whether you’re dealing with roommate conflict right now, or you simply want to avoid it, here is some advice to get through this tough situation:
Preventing and Resolving Roommate Conflict
1. Draw boundaries from the get-go. The instant you two move into together, you should sit down and create a structured set of boundaries. You must be willing to compromise and meet an agreement, but you must be stern from the beginning or else those boundaries are doomed to be crossed.
If you refuse to have overnight guests, then let that be known. Or, maybe you don’t want music played after midnight on the school nights, or you do not want anything of yours to be ever be touched or used without permission. Whatever it may be, set your boundaries and stick to them! However, it is necessary to be reasonable and willing to compromise in order to maintain peace and civility.
2. Open the lines of communication. It is imperative to construct an open line of communication from the very beginning. Do everything you can to foster a sense of openness, honesty and comfort, so that when roommate troubles come along, you will be ready to discuss them freely. Especially as a freshman, roommates can be a big shock to the system, so it’s important to make sure that there is open communication to facilitate the process of getting used to living in such a close proximity to someone.
3. Always show respect. Getting along with roommates may be a difficult process, but respect will always be the key ingredient that helps to facilitate the growth of a healthy relationship. Even if you don’t see eye-to-eye with your roommate, or agree with their choices, behaviors, etc., they still require your respect. If you can manage to keep your respect for them, you will find yourself having a much easier time relating to them, and your problems will be solved with much more grace and ease. The hard part is always offering your respect even if you feel they don’t deserve it.
4. Set up a schedule. One of the best bits of college roommate advice is to set up a schedule in the very beginning. Assign jobs to each of you and mutually agree on who will clean what on what days. You can even revert back to the days of elementary school and make a chart. Whatever helps the both of you to remember your duties, and to take the guess work and disappointment out of unmet expectations.
5. Spend some time together outside of your room. Most college roommate problems can be solved by actually spending some real time together. In the beginning, when you are getting to know each other, be sure to spend some time out doing something you both enjoy. Go for a run, go to a poetry reading, catch a movie, or whatever you two like to do. If you can bond from the beginning, instead of just being strangers that live together, you will be setting yourself up for a far greater experience.
What about YOU? Do you have any college roommate tips? Share in the comments section below!
